Beautiful President’s Day Fantasy

This post is part of a series of tongue-in-cheek streams of consciousness inspired by the holidays.

In 2016, a woman was so distraught over the choice between Hillary and Trump that she asked the wisest man in the village what such a development could mean for our future. The man pondered this question for 40 days, consulting telepathically with the Oracle of Delphi, Chochum the Ancient One of Mars as well as the Grandfather of All Knowledge. Having obtained insight across spacetime, and from even beyond our place of existence, he returned to the woman with the answer. The young lady was so moved by this conversation that she journeyed across the river Isen, proclaiming this gospel to the masses for 3 years before being put to death for creating a disturbance in the temple. Nevertheless, the word lives on my friends. As strong as the authoritarian power structures may be…they cannot yet kill an idea.

While the following sermon only references specific events from the 2016 election four, the message is still as relevant today. I relate to you now the teachings of the three seers as it was handed down to the unnamed wisdom man, who then related it to the unnamed woman, who told it to some guy, who told another guy, who told it to his wife, who’s friends with my Aunt, who told it to my uncle, who told it to my cousin, who forgot a few days later and asked my uncle to repeat it and then told it to his friend, who told it to their sister, who told it to me.

What if this election *is* entertainment? But not for us, for the 1%. They kept our champion asleep for 100 years like Maleficent…as a broken down old man, as token opposition for us to pathetically pin our hopes on. And then they tease us with the crook and the bigot, open liars, flaunting their corruption and bad manners in our faces at all times, sinking as low as possible and relishing in it, to tease us. How low can you go? How low can you go to vote AGAINST the other candidate? How many of your principles, how much of your sense of decency, will you sacrifice to feud pointlessly over a candidate even you yourself don’t believe in?

When it’s all over, the curtain will be pulled back. But it won’t be reassuring like in the Wizard of Oz. The masters will reveal what I suspect has been true since at least Kennedy. The creation of the FED, the reign of terror under J Edgar Hoover, and the Red Scare were the first steps. Now with militarized police, mass uprisings/shootings they can use as pretext, the technology for RFID chips, operating systems which track everything you do, control over culture via insane copyright law, the PRISM program, drones…now our masters can reveal the farce of national elections. That it doesn’t matter who you choose. The outcome is the same.

Sanders knows the truth, Obama told him in their private meeting before the convention. They will Carbon Freeze you. They will replace you with a clone who leads your followers astray, like Maria in Metropolis after the Machine-Man took her face. We have the technology. They had the information to clone Obama before he was even into local politics. Before then, it was just straight execution. That’s what the skeletons have been trying to tell us the entire time. You know who they are.

The Wars of the Robot, the Snake, the Fat Man and Awkward Turtle…it was all a lie. The rise of the Reagan caricature was the ultimate fuck you for the 1%. Salt in the wound to everyone. He will be the one to reveal the truth to us when they line the peasants up in chains to be pissed on, literally as well as metaphorically. “Even the showers are golden at Trump tower!”

We’re about to meet God, my friends. The Wizards are only common men, like us, but they’ve stolen our accumulated knowledge and technological power and consolidated it, made it a prison that serves them. We created this, we danced for the increasingly pathetic puppets they gave us, and now they will remove the pretense. WE were the bread and circuses for the rich. As species die off, the planet suffers under global warming, there will be no resources left but useless sacks of meat walking around. And they will eat us, they have been herding us into the system. We will be the Eloi, kept alive as a whole but individually picked off one by one to feed the bunker-dwellers.

The ruby slippers…the silver screens in your pocket…they were not your way home. They were your escape only in your imagination, while your home crumbled all around you. They’ve tagged you. And to drive the point further, they’ll tag you with an RFID chip to do business. TSA at every public function; open your rectum for examination. And they won’t even give us a cool cult of personality to worship, like Big Brother. It will be “Nos Abeulla, her Excellency Clinton” and she will be your nagging mother, reminding you she watches you masturbate, smoke, and fail. Mother never forgets. The mother is merciful…it is her you should thank…that you weren’t eaten today. The ultimate personification of the Nanny State.

The Ministry will not dissuade language by making it too simple to express complex thoughts. They will over-complicate it to the point where no one wants to say anything. A million rambling words to replace simple phrases now deemed offensive. We will all be at a loss for time between the many forced apologies in our every utterance. And they have confused the meaning of every social studies/political science term, so that no one can say anything with regard to socio-economic reform without having to argue that they’re not a ____ist, or what —–ism actually means. Every conversation will descend into whether the left or the right is responsible for XYZ issue, to where it no longer matters who’s trying to offer solutions.

We did it to ourselves, man. We really did. And we better hope there is no afterlife. If there were, we would be haunted by our hypocrisy to the animals. They would ask where was our outrage with factory farming, overhunting/fishing and habitat destruction when it affected THEM. Humanity will be tried before a court of all life and found guilty for crimes against nature. Modern humans will be tried by a court of their ancestors and castigated for wasting such incredible technology, which we might have used to learn and organize, merely to send dick pics and cat memes. Homo sapiens will be judged by all other sapient entities in the universe for our resistance to science, our inability to convert to clean energy even with decades of warning and the means to do it…and they will call us a disgrace to our potential, a waste of intelligence, failures of the universe. That will be our legacy.